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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 11:13 am
Joined: Tue Oct 23, 2007 1:55 pmPosts: 1315Location: FEST Board Troll
one time i got a blumpkin. it was pretty awesome.

yeah it's cool to have a chick s on your d, but it's even more liberating to know that hellz yeah, i just blasted a duke and this bitch is gonna be smelling that shit while slurpin all over my blasting rod.



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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 11:58 am
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
TheSean wrote:
"this is only admission to sex-land and is sort of tiring" (i mean 45 minutes? come on! ... literally)


Just like how some guys are near impossible to get off from a BJ (like alex13 admits to), some girls are real hard (hehe) to get off too. I think it is a matter of not completely relaxing and letting yourself enjoy the moment, instead of thinking about getting off the whole time.

Oh and, some girls prefer a little tongue action to sex. So it isn't always a ticket to sex-land. Personally, foreplay in completely underrated. And as people get older they seem to get impatient and want to skip straight to the sex. Boo.

Though, I know there are also guys out there that claim to prefer going down for HOURS over the act of sex. Even I get tired of that after a while. :wink:



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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:05 pm
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
alex13 wrote:
I know that going down on the vag-tastic is almost better than sex for me.


I've never heard vag-tastic before but I love it. For some reason I don't like any of the 100s of euphemisms for my girl parts. Guys have so many better reference words for their manhood that are manly and sexy sounding. While the female options rarely sound feminine and sexy...rather, just plain dirty and porn. But they have there moment too. :wink:



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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:09 pm
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
sawtooth wrote:
one time i got a blumpkin. it was pretty awesome.

yeah it's cool to have a chick s on your d, but it's even more liberating to know that hellz yeah, i just blasted a duke and this bitch is gonna be smelling that shit while slurpin all over my blasting rod.


Oh your eloquent terminology Andy...haha

You've got to be REALLY comfortable with someone to do that. Uh, and be into nasty sex shit too probably. You into getting hot plated? I mean it only seems fair for the girl giving you a blumpkin to hot plate you in return. :P

I had a boyfriend that I never saw take a shit for the 7yrs we were together. And I think that's really odd personally.



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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:46 pm
Joined: Tue Oct 23, 2007 1:55 pmPosts: 1315Location: FEST Board Troll
lol, no this chick was a straight up psycho. she tried to run me over one time, among numerous other horrible things. i was just in high school and i thought it would be cool to tell my friends the story.

it was awesome, but i would never think of having my gf now do that. we've managed to go over 7 years without a blumpkin lol. tempting, i'm sure.



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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:52 pm
Joined: Sat Aug 12, 2006 4:40 pmPosts: 175Location: gainesvegas
GatoRanch wrote:
TheSean wrote:
"this is only admission to sex-land and is sort of tiring" (i mean 45 minutes? come on! ... literally)


Just like how some guys are near impossible to get off from a BJ (like alex13 admits to), some girls are real hard (hehe) to get off too. I think it is a matter of not completely relaxing and letting yourself enjoy the moment, instead of thinking about getting off the whole time.

Oh and, some girls prefer a little tongue action to sex. So it isn't always a ticket to sex-land. Personally, foreplay in completely underrated. And as people get older they seem to get impatient and want to skip straight to the sex. Boo.

Though, I know there are also guys out there that claim to prefer going down for HOURS over the act of sex. Even I get tired of that after a while. :wink:


those guys are idiots. actually, anyone not completely relaxed is dumb. i mean, you're already naked and touching genitalia, what's to be nervous about? again, there's deeper issues probably. take the fat guy walking down the sidewalk 'hollerin at bitches and blasting hos left and right'. he doesn't care. has no reservations. and he probably won't take 34 hours to get off.

also, if the girl just plain has no technique, anyone can fail. it's true, there isn't that much to the basics, but you'd be surprised. I think most guys have had this moment :

"ok that's great, now let's just try sex" or "it's ok honey, i'll finish myself".

and the sex-land tongue-spelling quote WAS taunting. you can't be that serious, it's an act of entertainment and pleasure, not a G8 summit. foreplay is very underrated but there also is too much of a good thing. It depends on the person. some girls want about 35 seconds of cunnilingus and then they DEMAND you put a schlong in them. personally 5-10 minutes of foreplay is all i need/can take. enough tickling the back of my leg, stop biting my shoulder, that was great the first 12 times, but now the prelude has ended and it's time for tonight's feature. which will not last 3 hours. ok at least not one round. I've had some marathons in my day but the off-getting started reaching into the 10s (comprehensively). and unless it's some sort of porno flick you're taping, both parties deserve a little warmup. no blumpkins for me (shit and sex just cancel each other out for me, period) but a couple minutes of going down (sans climax, duh) for me is a quality investment.


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:54 pm
Joined: Sat Aug 12, 2006 4:40 pmPosts: 175Location: gainesvegas
sawtooth wrote:
lol, no this chick was a straight up psycho. she tried to run me over one time, among numerous other horrible things. i was just in high school and i thought it would be cool to tell my friends the story.



so um.. how bout them digits dawg? she sound FINE... hook a brotha up, i haven't been "run over" in years.


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 12:16 am
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
Holy fucking food fetish!

Meat hurler at Backyard BBQ - w4m - 20 (Archer Road)

You were standing in front of me at Backyard BBQ when I suddenly looked up and saw you hurling your two bacon cheeseburgers at the cashier and yelling obscenities. This turned me on a great deal and I hope that you contact me. I can't wait to have some meat rubbed all over my body. I like to be naughty in the bedroom and food always works well when I'm trying to get down and dirty. I can't wait to meet you meat man.

http://gainesville.craigslist.org/mis/1006380500.html



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PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 12:32 am
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
And I'm crying laughing reading this one:

My name is not Hot Carl!!! - m4w - 31 (Durty Nelly's)
Date: 2009-01-31, 7:06PM EST

We met at Durty Girl's night last Wednesday. We agreed, no names and no strings. We broke the "no strings" rule because you were on your period and well, you were wearing a tampon. The "no names" rule we stuck to and now I regret it. When you took that dump on my chest I told you to call me Carl...Hot Carl. But now I NEED to see you again and I don't know where to find you. There's a cold spot on my chest that you need to heat up.

http://gainesville.craigslist.org/mis/1015777025.html



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 4:15 am
User avatarJoined: Sun Oct 19, 2008 5:21 pmPosts: 635Location: Second City, USA!
This is my favorite ad ever!

Butt sex and Mario Brothers...

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/orl/740493470.html


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 4:00 pm
User avatarJoined: Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:47 pmPosts: 1002Location: Cranston, RI
the world scares me



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 5:40 pm
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
Some_Kind_of_Robot wrote:
This is my favorite ad ever!

Butt sex and Mario Brothers...

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/orl/740493470.html


Ahhh yes, sexual multitasking at its finest....hahaaa



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 5:41 pm
User avatarJoined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 6:16 amPosts: 4092Location: Nature Coast & Gville, FL
pukeonthestreet wrote:
the world scares me


don't be so scared...I'm betting at least 2 if not all three of those craigslists posts above are fake. :wink:



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 6:27 pm
User avatarJoined: Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:47 pmPosts: 1002Location: Cranston, RI
in related craigslist news I was bored and posted a real personal ad and mostly got spam in response, but then today an actual person answered me and she digs the music I like and goes to RISD even, things are looking up!



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 11:20 pm
Joined: Tue Oct 31, 2006 1:42 pmPosts: 2674Location: Gainesville
pukeonthestreet wrote:
in related craigslist news I was bored and posted a real personal ad and mostly got spam in response, but then today an actual person answered me and she digs the music I like and goes to RISD even, things are looking up!

hope you asked for pics



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